Ozzy is one one the Xmen and his power is partying. Awesome.

Ozzy is one one the Xmen and his power is partying.   Awesome.

Scientists have sequenced Ozzy Osbourne's genome and discovered that he's a mutant. Seriously. Ozzy has several gene variants that "we've never seen before," said geneticist Nathaniel Pearson, offering a possible explanation for why the rocker's lifestyle hasn't killed him yet.

http://abcnews.go.com/Health/Wellness/genetic-mutations-ozzy-osbourne-party-hard/story?id=12032552&page=2

Segway Owner Dies in Segway Accident

 Segway mogul Jimi Heselden, the 395th-richest man in Great Britian, died Sunday when he rode his Segway off a cliff. Heselden had been inspecting the property of his West Yorkshire estate on a "ruggedcountry version of the Segway" when he apparently lost control of the vehicle. Police said they found a body "in the River Wharfe, apparently having fallen from the cliffs above." A "Segway-style vehicle was recovered" nearby. Police say they don't suspect foul call, but they're investigating the machine to determine whether a mechanical or human error caused the crash.

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Butts Arrested in Boob Murder Case

Unfortunate names involved in an unfortunate incident.

http://wearecentralpa.com/wtaj-news-fulltext/?nxd_id=203465

 

 

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Hey Gamers! Turn Your Wii Remote Into A Vibrator

Mojowijo has created a device that attaches to a Nintendo Wii remote control, turning it into a sex toy.

http://www.mojowijo.com/

http://www.comedycentral.com/tosh.0/2010/09/01/turn-your-wii-remote-into-a-vibrator-finally/

Survey Says: Genetics Affect Whether We're Willing to Take Surveys

It sounds like an Onion article but it's for real.  Want to test if genetics affect if you'll take a survey?  Then take a survey.



http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/08/100830094932.htm

Double Duty Cat Litter -twice the poops

Double Duty Advanced Odor Control Clumping Cat Litter

Arm & Hammer Double Duty Advanced Odor Control Clumping Cat Litter eliminates both types of odors for advanced odor control. Its breakthrough formula destroys urine and feces odors instantly, and helps keep your home smelling fresh and clean. Its powerful moisture-activated baking soda crystals boosted with feces odor neutralizers destroy urine and feces odors on contact. Rock solid clumps let you remove the source of odors easily. The 99% dust free, low tracking formula releases a fresh scent every time your cat uses the litter box.

Slap Hat

Slap Hat Extreme Self Defense Cap

This standard baseball cap is one the most simple, least noticeable, and efficient personal defense items on the market. The secret of this hat is a pocket of unique impact material that is 100% the density of lead and which is sewn into the cap. Simply use the bill as the handle and the cap becomes an instant impact weapon to be used against a threat. Simple, fast, and effective! The cap includes Velcro adjustment to fit all sizes.

http://www.amazon.com/Slap-Hat-Extreme-Self-Defense/dp/B002YYZV5O/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=sporting-goods&qid=1282943500&sr=8-1

NANOBEES

Microscopic nanobees 'sting cancer tumours to death'

Microscopic "nanobees" that literally sting tumours to death have been successfully used to fight cancer by researchers in America. 

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/science-news/6005311/Microscopic-nanobees-sting-cancer-tumours-to-death.html 

REAL LIFE IS CRAZY

Real persons, places, and things that could be satire.  And stuff I think is funny.  This shit be crazy.